[D] Standing in the dock at Southampton, trying to get to Holland or France 

The  

[D7] man in the mac said you've got to go back 

You know they didn't even give us a chance 

Chorus: 

Christ you know it ain't  

[G] easy you know how hard it can  

[D] be 

The way things are  

[A7] going they're gonna crucify  

[D] me 

[D] Finally made the plane into Paris, honeymooning down by the Seine 

Peter  

[D7] Brown called to say you can make it OK 

You can get married in Gibraltar near Spain Chorus 

[D] Drove from Paris to the Amsterdam Hilton, talking in our beds for a week 

The  

[D7] newspaper said say what you doing in bed 

I said we're only trying to get us some peace Chorus 

[G] Saving up your money for a rainy day 

Giving all your clothes to charity 

Last night the wife said oh boy when you're dead 

You  

[A7] don't take nothing with you but your soul –think 

[D] Made a lightning trip to Vienna, eating chocolate cake in a bag 

The  

[D7] newspaper said she's gone to his head 

They look just like two gurus in drag Chorus 

[D] Caught the early plane back to London, 

Fifty acorns tied in a sack 

The  

[D7] men from the press said we wish you success 

It's good to have the both of you back Chorus 

The way things are  

[A7] going they're gonna crucify  

[D] me